When I Was a Child

Scripture: Matthew 18:1-4; Mark 10:13-16; I Corinthians 13:11

Sermon by Dr. George Bryant Wirth

First Presbyterian Church of Atlanta

September 17, 2000

 

Introduction

In his classic book Stages of Faith: the Psychology of Human Development and the Quest for Meaning (Harper Collins, 1981), Dr. James Fowler, who is a personal friend, a prolific author and a well-known professor at Emory University, creates an imaginary conversation between Erik Erikson, Jean Piaget and Lawrence Kohlberg. As these three pioneers in the field of human growth talk together about the process of birth and infancy, growing up and getting older and finally facing the reality of death, they confirm what most of us have heard, or read or observed in our own experience: that the first twelve years of life we call childhood shape our identity and determine our ability to navigate throughout the rest of the journey.

 

During childhood, these experts say, we develop a sense of trust, discover a world of wonder, begin to discern right from wrong and start to learn how to give and receive love. And although the stages of childhood are theoretically complicated, as Dr. Fowler observes in this imaginary conversation thanking Erikson, Piaget and Kohlbergh for “giving us a lot to digest as we try to grasp the contours of cognitive, moral and psychosocial development in the elementary years” (page 67), even so, these experts and all the rest of us know that simply being and becoming a little girl or boy can be as uncomplicated as splashing through mud puddles, playing in the sandbox and laughing out loud with joy!

 

Part 1

As we continue to talk together about our theme for this new church year, “Justice, Kindness and Humility for All God’s Children,” it is important to remember that Jesus paid attention to, took great delight in and showered His love upon little children. And what He had to say about them has profound implications for all of us still today.

 

In the 18^th chapter of Matthew we read that Jesus’ disciples came to Him and asked Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? (Matthew 18:1) No doubt, they were wondering where each of them fit in the pecking order, a game of adult one-upsmanship those disciples played far too frequently, as we still do today. I think Jesus had grown weary of the game, so He called a little boy to come stand in the midst of them, looked at him and said Unless you become like children, you will never enter the kingdom…for whoever humbles themselves like a child will be greatest in the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:3-4)

 

Well, apparently, the message didn’t get through. Because in the gospel of Mark, chapter 10, as people were bringing their children to Jesus, the disciples rebuked them, thinking, probably, that the Lord had more important things to do. Not so, said Jesus. Let the children come to me, do not hinder them. For to such belongs the kingdom of God…and He picked those little ones up into His arms and blessed them… (Mark 10:13-16)

 

You see, not only did Jesus love those children – He lifted them up as an example, as a sign and symbol of what it means to be humble, to let go of our adult egos and let God show us how to live with a sense of wonder, how to love our sisters and brothers, how to laugh and cry and release our emotions, how to relax and play without being tied down by the notion of taking ourselves too seriously. In other words, said Jesus, you grown-ups need to lighten up and become more like children! And as that happens, the Heavenly Father will welcome and embrace you with open arms into His kingdom.

 

Part 2

So how can we do that? I think we can begin by remembering and re-connecting with the joyful moments of our childhood.

 

The late Robert Holland, pastor for many years at the Shadyside Presbyterian Church in Pittsburgh, preached a sermon in 1982 entitled “Well, Open the Package!” It was about a childhood memory of Christmas Day in his boyhood home of Schenectady, New York. His Aunt Millie had joined the family for the holidays and on Christmas morning, after young Robert and his brother George had opened all of their gifts, Aunt Millie said to them, “Boys, there’s one more present.” “What is it?” they inquired with anticipation. Aunt Millie smiled and told them “We’re going to get on a train, travel to New York City, stay in a hotel, see a show at Radio City Music Hall, worship at St. John the Divine Cathedral, ride on a subway and eat in an automat.” The brothers were beside themselves with excitement and asked their aunt “When can we go?” She looked at them and answered “Right now!” for unbeknownst to them, their parents had packed their suitcases, made all the preparations and within ten minutes Aunt Millie, Robert and George were whisked off to the railroad station to begin their adventure. (From a sermon “Well, Open the Package!” preached by Robert Cleveland Holland on December 24, 1982, in the Shadyside Presbyterian Church)

 

Do you remember moments like that from your childhood, moments of exhilaration and excitement when your heart was glad and the whole world seemed to sing “Alleluia”? Just so, said Jesus, we grown-ups need to become childlike all over again and recover that kind of joy deep down in our souls.

 

For some of us, it may happen spontaneously, without much effort, as simple as a walk in the park or an evening spent in conversation and laughter with close friends. For others, it might require some planning – a family vacation or a trip to a special destination where we can get away from the pressures of work and let go of the worries that weigh us down.

 

However, whenever, wherever it happens, what is essential is that we make the time and take the time to receive the gift of childlike joy which God wants to give to us. And we don’t have to wait until Christmas. If we’re ready and willing, we can open that package right now!

 

Part 3

Consider another dimension of what it means to become like children, wherein we ask God to help us heal and release the painful memories of our past.

 

For just as all of us can remember joyful moments in childhood, we, every one of us, have painful memories from those days gone by. Even now, thinking about what happened back then can bring tears to our eyes. And unless, until we make peace with those disturbing events and difficult experiences, they will continue to hurt us.

 

John Claypool, the rector of St. Luke’s Episcopal Church in Birmingham, Alabama, who has preached from this pulpit, wrote a book last year entitled Mending the Heart. In the last chapter, Claypool recalls a deeply painful memory, the death of his ten-year-old daughter to leukemia. As he was thinking of her one night, he writes:

 

“…A long forgotten memory came to the surface…during World War II…we did not have a washing machine, gasoline was severely rationed and the closest laundry was several miles away. When one of my father’s younger business associates was drafted into the Army and needed a place to store his furniture, we ended up with an old green Bendix washing machine we could use in return for storage space.

 

At the ripe old age of eleven, I was put in charge of the family laundry. So for the next four years, every Tuesday and Friday, I practiced the ritual of coming home from school, going down into the basement and doing the laundry…and during those years, I developed an affectionate bond with that washing machine.

 

In 1945, the war came to an end and my father’s business associate returned home. One day when I was at school, a truck pulled up and took all of his belongings from our basement, including the old Bendix. No one told me, however, and since it was one of my regular wash days, I gathered up the clothes as usual and went down to the basement. To this day I can recall my sense of utter shock when I saw that gaping, empty space…I rushed back upstairs in a panic and announced loudly to my mother, ‘We’ve been robbed! Someone’s stolen our washing machine!’

 

My mother took that occasion to teach me something very profound. ‘John’ she said, ‘you must have forgotten how that washing machine got to be in our basement in the first place. It never belonged to us, and the fact that we ever got to use it at all was incredible good fortune. So remember, John, you treat gifts differently from the way you treat possessions. When something belongs to you and it is taken away, you have a right to be angry. But when something is a gift and it is taken away from you, you can use that occasion to give thanks that it was ever given at all.’”

 

Claypool concludes: “I had completely forgotten this experience, but that night...it came to me that Laura Lue had been a part of my life in the same way. She was a gift, not a possession…and at that moment, I decided to take the road of gratitude out of the valley of the shadow of grief, rather than the road of resentment…gratitude does not eliminate the pain and frustration that accompany the work of rebuilding one’s life…but it does take away the anger and the feeling that a terrible injustice has been done…gratitude deepens our sense of trust as we begin to believe that the One who gave us the good old days can be trusted to give us good new days as well.” (From Mending the Heart, by John Claypool, Cowley Publications, 1999, pages 63-66)

 

If you have come here this morning carrying the burden of painful childhood memories from the past, then listen to the good news of the gospel: Jesus Christ wants to help you mend your heart, and find the peace of mind you seek. Through the healing power of His Holy Spirit, He may lead you to a family member or friend, to a pastor or professional counselor in this church, or draw you deeper in prayer and ultimately enable you to forgive whoever it was that hurt you a long time ago.

 

One way or another, Jesus is ready to guide you, so that the childlike spirit inside you can finally be set free.

 

Conclusion

Now just to be certain that no one leaves today with the wrong impression, when Jesus told His disciples that they needed to become like children, He was not advocating regression back into childish behavior. You know what I mean – jibber jabber, temper tantrums, food all over the floor beneath the high chair, and sixteen glasses of water before bedtime. Maybe that’s what the Apostle Paul had in mind when he wrote those words to the Corinthians: When I was a child, I spoke like a child, thought like a child and reasoned like a child. But when I became an adult, I gave up childish ways. (I Corinthians 13:11)

 

No, Jesus wasn’t talking about being childish. He was telling us, teaching us, showing us how to be childlike: that is, able to trust, open to wonder, eager to give and receive love, to feel joy and to find forgiveness. And if we ever give up on these things, said Jesus, we will lose our way into the Kingdom of God.

 

In the name of the Father, and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.